Last week I worked 60 hours. I can’t quite remember if I saw my children, or daylight. It was hell.
Come Saturday I was burnt out and it gave me a reality check. Over the weekend I took a step back and tried to decide if this ‘constantly on’ work mode I had found myself in had become the new norm, or was just a flux in the work:life balance.
As working mums we talk constantly about the #jugglestruggle and for me, that mythical work:life balance concept is like a set of scales that are constantly shifting. There is no magic fixed ratio to strive towards; some weeks, like last week, are heavily weighted on the ‘work’ side and I barely lifted my head above the digital parapet… while others, like this week mean life takes centre stage – I got to bunk off and see the 2yo’s first Sports Day and spend a completely indulgent 3 hours in the hairdressers.
Since launching my own business last year, I’ve come to realise I need to look at the bigger picture. Yes, some weeks, like last week, were waaaaay too work heavy, but did it balance out in the end? Yes. As long as you keep that light and shade, you’re on to a good thing.
Here are 5 quick things that I do to try and keep that balance in check:
1/ Journalling – something that I’ve really got into this year is keeping a journal. Not in a ‘dear diary’ sense, but even on the hardest, 16-hour slogs of days, I will take some time before bed to jot down some highlights. Anything, some days it feels like clutching at straws but whether it’s a compliment I got about my outfit or a satisfying session with a client, I find that if I look for the positive spin on even the hardest of days, there is something to be proud of.
2/ Walk in the woods, swim in the sea – for me, balancing out my digital life with some serious off-grid detoxing works wonders. At weekends a big long walk with the boys, friends and dogs just re-sets me. Ditto, at this time of year – getting home, throwing the boys and our beachgear in the car and going for a swim in the sea literally washes off my working day.
3/ Don’t work a 9-5 – I’ve learnt that I can be more fluid in my days and that takes the stress off the flow of our family life. If I want to go to assembly and see the 6yo getting an award and balance that out with a couple of hours catch up in the evening once the boys are asleep, that’s fine. It’s about working when it works for you.
4/ Run – I’ve written before about why I run and I definitely notice how much more ‘in control’ I feel and how better I cope with the stresses of both work AND life when I’m regularly running. If I can go for a run in the woods and encorporate no. 2 at the same time, BINGO.
5/ Pick up the phone. No, not that one. I am as guilty as the next of spending waaaaay too much time staring at a screen (it’s where my business lives!) but weirdly, unless it’s for a client meeting, I’m really bad at picking up the phone to chat. A proper, girly phone gossip with my best friends is a true luxury – there are usually children hanging off us or we’re rushing to work, but we’re trying. Friendships of 20 years+ are magic – these girls know me like no-one else and sometimes just knowing they’ve ‘got me’, is all I need to get me through a tough working week.
I would love to know how you manage the #jugglestruggle! I’m constantly looking for tips and advice – let me know!
